Moms Don’t Get To Clock Out!

A couple of years ago, I used to work at least 40 hours a week at a fast food restaurant. I would work from 10:00am until 9:00pm (open to close). My break would usually be around 2:00pm, and I would get an hour. I remember how ready I would be to clock out for that glorious hour. I got to listen to music, eat, or sleep… whatever I wanted for one whole hour. It was always so refreshing. It was always just what I needed to get through the rest of my work day.

Fast forward to my life now. I love being a stay at home mom. I make my own schedule, I get to stay home with my baby, and I get to do things at my own pace. It has more upsides than downsides, but lately it has been a little bit of a struggle for me. My son is on the move! He’s crawling, sitting, and he loves to play with anything that isn’t a toy. Our PlayStation is within his reach until we figure out a way to cover it so I’m constantly just picking him up and trying to distract him with other things.

I used to be able to set him it his walker or on the floor, and he would stay in one spot and play with his toys for a good while. I would do my chores close to him, and I would get a lot done during the day, but now it takes me forever to even do one thing because I’m always keeping JJ from getting into harms way. He doesn’t like being confined to his walker anymore so I just let him roam around. He loves to crawl under the coffee table, and then he’ll try to sit up, and he hits his head. So it’s a never ending chase down!

I love watching him grow and be independent-ish, but man am I tired. The house always looks like an explosion too because I only have time for one household chore before my boyfriend gets home because it takes me like triple the time to do anything. JJ also only likes to nap if I’m holding him now. If I lay him into the crib, he wakes up instantly. When my boyfriend comes home, I cook dinner. Then I wash the dishes, and then I spend time with him because that is more important than a perfect house. He does help me keep JJ out of harm’s way when he’s home so that helps, but I feel like he should rest more because he’s the one who works all day. So mama is still on duty.

We do have a lot of fun though. I play with JJ during the day time, and Javier and I both give him lots of attention in the evenings too. We love watching him grow and learn, and we’re always cracking up at the little noises he makes to try to communicate with us. He likes to go “whooo whooo” like an owl. He’s such a great baby. He’s just very curious!

Also bedtime is now an adventure of it’s own. No matter how I do his naps (2 a day, one a day, early or late) he hates going to bed, and he fights it. No matter how early I start a routine, he won’t sleep until 11:00pm or so. We put him to sleep in his crib that is in the living room, but he wakes up and wants to play during the night. He hardly ever cries. He just wants to play. I try to just make him sleepy again. I never give in and play because he’ll get used to me playing with him at 3:00am, and he needs to know that mom does not work like that. I’ve also tried all of the “feeding him closer to bedtime” and other tricks, but he wakes up no matter what we do.

It’s hard to get him to sleep, but when he is asleep, he looks so sweet. He looks like a precious little innocent angel. Also, sometimes I accidentally fall asleep on the couch putting him to sleep. I have slept on the couch more than my bed for the past few nights, and I hate it, but I get so exhausted that I just fall asleep. Sometimes you just take the sleep whenever and wherever you can get it.

I love my son more than anything, but sometimes I do wish I could “clock out” and refresh for an hour, but that’s not reality for a stay at home mom. We are on call 24/7 365 days a year. Although it can get overwhelming, I do have to remember that I am lucky to be able to stay home with my son. A lot of moms do everything that I do AND they work too. I also remind myself that my son will not be this way forever. One day he will be a grown man, and I won’t be able to protect him the way that I can now. I need to enjoy these moments even though I feel burnt out and exhausted. These are the moments I will never get back.